Weight Watcher's Diaries Part Eleven
By Carol Daelemans

First "post-fat" shopping trip. The morning of...
I'm psyched. My oldest girl is riding bikes with her Auntie and the littlest one is spending the day traveling in Daddy's little sports car from "French fry stores" to "fun parks" for as much of the day as the two of them can stand. This leaves me free to go shopping with my mother. You have to know how valuable an entire day free of small children and your spouse is to fully comprehend the sense of freedom I feel. Both my mother and I have been looking forward to this day for weeks. The mall on a weekend is no picnic but leaving the children behind and arriving with the sales staff is a shopaholic's dream come true.

The Night Before Our Big Outing...
I had a whole long list of things I wanted to shop for. I felt like a kid at Christmas. I wanted pants because mine are falling off far too often. What a wonderful problem to have but still very irritating. I wanted new, cuter underwear because we all know that Fat Ladies do not get cute underwear. I needed a dress for a wedding and I secretly wanted to try on at least one thing in the "regular people" department. I realize this could sabotage my new body image in a heart beat but I was feeling prepared.

The Morning After...
In retrospect, I should have been a tad bit more realistic and less ambitious with my shopping list. The Mall is too big and my Mom and I are too old to cover every square inch in one day, let alone half the departments in the first store.

We started off in the "fat ladies" section. Might as well be realistic. Besides, I can't leave those kind sales people yet. I tried on several dresses but it wasn't like any of my previous shopping experiences. This time I didn't want to try on the frumpy dresses. If you've ever looked at the clothes in the full figured women's department you get the idea that anyone over 150 pounds is either dull as dishwater, incredibly old or so stylistically challenged they can't live without circus, holiday and floral themed garments garnished with giant, rhinestone studded, quilted appliqués and puff paints. We don't get the pretty stuff.

Thankfully, there are several designers who've decided to make at least a few things available to the larger woman. I tried some on. Lots of bright colored, low cut, silky, swishy dresses. "Twirly dresses" as my girls say. I was feeling good and I wanted to look good. I know that I'm not beach bunny material—yet—but I am so ready to stop wearing clothes that hide me.

I found this beautiful Ralph Lauren, brightly colored, silk floral dress that I felt good in. Then it was off to find the best bra and underwear my budget could buy. Looking for bras I discovered that all of those pretty colors and designs are reserved exclusively for little people. If you're past a certain size we do not sell you pretty colors. You get beige, beige, beige or beige. Maybe black.

The bra I liked came in pink and blue but not in my size. One sales lady told me flat out, "Mam, they do not make it in your size." Nice. This turns out not to be strictly true. It seems they don't sell it my size in pretty colors at her store. But my favorite department store manages to come through for me. Not only do they have pink which will look so much nicer with the orange and multi floral dress, but they can order it for me in any other color I like. It pays to shop at certain higher-end stores if you like a little service. This advice is true no matter what size you wear.

My next stop involved under garments. Victoria's Secret does not cater to the full figured woman. This is not Victoria's secret. Everyone whose ever flipped through their catalogue knows this. This is also not a big problem for me at this point. I like a little color but I'm not ready for thongs yet.

What I really enjoy is a good pair of Spanx. For those of you who are unenlightened in the ways of Spanx, they are the modern day girdle but so much more comfortable. They are also for all sizes. Who among us doesn't have a few areas in need of a nip tuck for at least for one evening? Spanx hold you in stem to stern. Since more than 50% of my body can be considered nip tuck worthy at any given time, I prefer "Spanx of a Higher Power."

These beautiful inventions hold you in like you're sucking in your breath from just underneath your breasts right down to your knees. I don't know about you but I can't suck in that much on my own and certainly not through an entire wedding. The added advantage to Spanx is that you can still breathe. I don't know exactly how they work but I'm never waiting to exhale when I'm wearing them.

Our final stop on our shopping extravaganza was the "regular people" departments. Not regular people shops of course. Who wants the embarrassment of getting kicked out of Bebe on your permanent record? Instead, we went through Nordstrom, my most favorite department store ever. I've heard a lot of people swear by Nordstrom and I know why. They treat everyone better than any other store I've been into and will always act like it makes perfect sense for a 200 pound woman to be browsing through the Petite racks.

I tried on many dresses in Petites and discovered that a regular person size 16 is not always bigger or even the same size as a big person size 14. I wasn't surprised but my spirits were dashed. After 20 dresses or so, I tried on a very cute Capri length pant suit. Capris are ankle length perfect on me. I can get thinner, but I don't think I'll ever be taller. Feeling like Freida frump in frayed clothes falling off you because you've lost a little weight isn't so inspiring. Very cute feels very good. Feeling good in your clothes is something you deserve to feel no matter what your size. And it's very motivating. I'm off to the gym!